How The Grinches
Stole the Election

    by Andrew A. Skolnick

All Whos in Whoville liked free elections a lot,
But the Grinches from Texas sadly did not.

The Grinches hated liberty and all who are free.
Don't ask me to explain what their reasons might be.

It could be their heads weren't screwed on just right.
It could be perhaps that their shoes were too tight.

But I think that the most likely reason of all,
May have been that their hearts were two sizes too small.


But what ever the reason, their hearts or their shoes,
They cooked up a plan to enslave all the Whos.

They ran for election and on voting night,
Waited for the Whos to turn out the light.

When all of the Whos were asleep in their beds,
They stole into Whoville, mean thoughts in their heads.

Only the newsmen were up and still scurrying --
For guessing the winner required much hurrying,

With flipping of coins and much hocus pocus,
They were far too busy to notice the ruckus

Raised by the Grinches, when into Whoville they shot,
To the section of Whoville that favored them not.

With their crooked green hands and the stealth of a fox
They removed all the ballots from each voters' box.

After shoving each chad back into its hole,
They scurried and slinked to the next voting poll.

Cheney Grinch _______Bush Grinch

        Loyal Max


             Judge Frollo

That's how the Grinches stole the election one night
Then ruled all in Whoville with meaness and spite,

And taking from the poor to give to the rich
Until the poor Whos had barely a stitch.

Don't ask me to explain why Whos never caught on,
Or why they were fooled by so blatant a con.

Some say a Who's brain must be two sizes too small
To have let the Grinches get away with it all.

No matter the reason, there's a rule to be learned:
Protect your elections or you'll also be burned.

Dick Cheney and Mr. Potter - Separated at Birth!

Click here to see the 'scurvy little spiders' side by side

"They misunderestimated me."
-- George W. Bush,
Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000

Want More to Laugh and Cry About?

Click the Cheat on His Crack Seasoned Nose

What me govern?

What, me govern?

It's Time to Vote with Our Bumpers

Give a bumper sticker for Christmas!

2000 Andrew A. Skolnick